When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Everything about him screamed your future.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
