I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
