So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Dear god my vagina.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
