I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
