IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
