Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i dont even know how to be here
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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