If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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