WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
