KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Randomize
