New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
