plz talk dirty to me
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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