i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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