i would punch a child for taco bell
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
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