suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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