you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
how drunk are you?
Several
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
