TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Boobs are out for the taking
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
