Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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