So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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