she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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