My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just blew my weed a kiss
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
