I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
