But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
