If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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