You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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