Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
