It's Friday. Sex?
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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