If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
