I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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