I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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