i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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