proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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