just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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