We won't sleep together?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
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