the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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