Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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