I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
