Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
