Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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