Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
