i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
