Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
