Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
