office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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