found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
