She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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