Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
