You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I accidentally had phone sex last night
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
