I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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