its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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