id be glad to
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
